Pranav Dhanawade slammed 1009 from 323 balls, including 129 fours and 59 sixes, for his KC Gandhi School against a second string Arya Gurukul School.
REUTERS
Schoolboy Pranav Dhanawade, 15, scored a world record 1009 in one innings.
That's right. One thousand and nine runs. It's such a large number you feel an urge to put it into Roman numerals, which would be MIX, for the record.
More than half his runs came from fours (516) and a further 354 runs came from sixes.
Whoop-de-doo. A 15-year-old me could have scored 1009 against a bunch of 12-year-olds, too.
It's just not cricket.
Then you take into account the 27m boundaries, which of course is smaller than a normal in field, it makes things even worse.
Sure, on a full size ground hitting 59 sixes against anyone is impressive, but 27m boundaries? Really? That's a mishit.
That would be like putting Martin Guptill up against the Kapiti College first-XI at Eden Park. Who wouldn't back Guptill to send one or 50 booming into the stands.
It's just not cricket.
But wait, like a television infomercial, there's more.
These 12-year-olds were terrified of the leather ball, as most kids are when they haven't played with one before.
Most fully grown adult cricketers fear a hard cricket ball when rocking up for their first training of the year. It slaps into the hands, sprains fingers, and generally leaves you searching for ice just before bedtime.
So to take a bunch of kids who have only played with tennis balls, and have them attempt to take catches with this red demon for the first time. Good luck.
No wonder it has been reported there were about 21 dropped catches during the innings.
It's just not cricket.
Oh, and that's right. Dhanawade's team bowled first. They rolled the 12-year-olds for only 31 runs, 12 of which were extras.
Dhanawade opened the batting. The first wicket fell at 546. The second wicket fell at 1077. At what point did KC Gandhi think they had enough runs to win the match.
Have you heard of the Spirit of Cricket? Here's what comes up in the rule book.
"Cricket is a game that owes much of its unique appeal to the fact that it should be played not only within its Laws but also within the Spirit of the Game. Any action which is seen to abuse this Spirit causes injury to the game itself."
Not to mention a bunch of 12-year-old kids, right?
There is no way Dhanawade's innings was within the spirit of cricket.
He was 15, you might say, but that doesn't matter. At 15, playing backyard cricket, you always knew when your turn at bat was getting a little long. That's generally when you'd start batting with the wrong hand, looking to lob catches to anyone on the back lawn.
I'm not saying I'm a perfect example of the laws of cricket.
In a club game I once successfully appealed for a player to be out for obstructing the field. Part of me still thinks that was the right call, but with the commotion it caused, and there was some serious commotion, a larger part of me wishes I'd allowed the guy to continue batting.
That conundrum in my head seems insignificant compared to smashing a bunch of toddlers around to the tune of a thousand runs.
So here's my final plea.
Hey, Sachin Tendulkar, give me a signed bat. I'd be capable of destroying the bowling of 12-year-olds just as well, if not better, than Pranav Dhanawade.
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